Love Letter #2
This is my first love letter to you and I am hoping it won’t be the last. I am writing this with tears in my eyes because my emotions are a mess right now. I am giving you my heart and sitting here hoping that you won’t break and you’ll hold onto it with the care and reserve I had only for you.
I love you, no I am completely in love with you often times I wonder how we got here because I never saw it coming. I would never take it back and I am glad that I get to experience you in this lifetime, this isn’t our first run and it can only end in two ways. We end up together or we part ways I have been thinking about the latter and I started to feel like it was taking away from experiencing you in the present.
I love you. I should have said it sooner but I don’t know what difference it would have made. I lost all fear when I finally texted it to you, and the only reason why I didn’t say it in person was that I was afraid of being rejected. I am not new to unrequited love and it’s been haunting me this year, rearing its ugly face and making itself known.
I love you. I loved you yesterday, I love you today and I’ll love you tomorrow. I love you enough to let you go if you weren’t happy being here with me but not enough to push you away. The old me would have pushed you away before my feelings grew stronger because I’d rather lose you at the beginning and have fewer memories and the time we spent together to ponder over.
I love you. I love how we have eased into this, I am more familiar with your patterns and your moods and mannerisms. I can sense when you’re sad or bothered or when I should be chatty or just sit in comfortable silence with you. We are two very different people and maybe the only thing we have in common is the shows you have recommended or that we both love food. I have picked up some of your habits and I wonder if you have to.
I love you. In an ideal world, I’ll keep writing you love letters and our love for each other will only grow stronger. I wish I could say I want to feel how I felt for you in the beginning but we have had too many beginnings and lost chances and I wish I knew what would have been the outcome of each trial but I’ll never know because all we have is now.
I love you. I love almost everything about you. The way you care for me and make me feel wanted and needed and constantly check on me so that I know that I am usually on my mind. You’re intentional with the way you speak to me and what you say and apologise if you're wrong. If this isn’t real please pretend forever because I never want this to end.
I love you. I don’t why I keep saying it, once I said it I felt like a heavy load had been lifted.
I loved you and that was never enough.
