Do you find the validation you seek by pretending to be happy on social media?
In a world of unanswered texts and phone calls we often mistake the bare minimum of basic communication as something more. I’m guilty of not answering phone calls, it’s somewhat new for me because I’d always be on my phone. Text or call me anytime and I’d be there. If you sent me a text be guaranteed that you’d get a text back in less than 5 minutes but that is not the case anymore. You can’t count on me like that. Call me unreliable if you may.
Maybe I’m growing and evolving or maybe it isn’t that deep and I just don’t feel the need to be online as often. All of this started sometime last year and I’d open my WhatsApp and scroll through my chats and not respond and after that, it became a routine but I soon feel out of it. It’s been on and off lately but I need to get back into it.
I get it, communication has gotten easier and we’re brought closer to each other cause I can pick up my phone and call someone that’s over a thousand miles away and the distance vanishes in seconds and that’s great but I’m started to feel boxed in, suffocated.
I’m starting to feel like I don’t need to know how someone is doing every hour. I’m starting to care less for social media and it may seem like I’m caving into myself even further because I would rather text someone than go out and see them and now I’d just rather not, I don’t know if this means that I’ll put in more effort in actually going out more and seeing more of the world by scrolling through my Instagram in the confines of my bed. We’ll see how that goes.
I turned off all the notifications on all of my social media accounts, it’s the easier cause that way I don’t have to check my phone each time I get an alert. I haven’t been tracking hours but I feel like I’m getting better. I spent about a week sometime in December barely checking my phone and it was refreshing cause I only responded to messages when I had to and the longest time I spent was watching documentaries I had saved on my youtube.
Now me not responding to your messages immediately should not affect our friendship and if it’s really important a text message is fine. Call if necessary but I may or may not pick up because I can’t stand phone calls most times.
I never thought I’d say this but social media is exhausting. It’s getting physically draining, it is a great tool for communication and has made running businesses so much easier.
You allow a certain precedent by showing your private life on social media and I’ve seen people have meltdowns because of a comment they for from strangers on the internet. I feel like it comes from validation people seek on social media, like all those likes, comments, retweets, and shares equal your self-worth.
You take approximately 10–15 photos and only upload 1 or 2. But even before that you pick out the most perfect one and add a filter to make it more appealing and once you click upload you check the photo of 5 minutes to see how many reactions you’ve garnered. Not as much as you’d like because someone else that you know got more likes and you started to wonder what’s wrong.
I don’t know where I’m going with all of this, I was guilty of scrolling through my Instagram and seeing all these fashion nova models with their perfect bodies and skin while I feel like I’m built like a 15-year-old boy and my skin is prone to breakouts. And I went through phases of hating my body. You can read more about that here
It’s easy to feel like you’re not doing anything in your life because people online post all of their achievements and you may feel like you’re less but you’re not and we’re all on different paths.
I end here and I know it’s been a while since I wrote anything and I hope I write again soon.
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